Avoidance-Based Motivation 101
We are all motivated by avoiding pain, but letting our fear drive us can drain our energy.
A couple of weeks ago, I gave an overview of the elements of an inner drive – the things that consistently get us to act and persist over time.
As a refresher, avoidance-based drivers compel us to do something not so that we generate satisfaction, but rather so that we do not have to experience something negative or that we don’t like or don’t want to have happen. We take action in order to avoid feeling discomfort, hurt, conflict, awkwardness, or other unpleasant experiences – aka “pain” of some sort.
The list of avoidance-based drivers is very long and unique to each person. For simplicity, I offer you seven broad categories of “threats” humans try to avoid.
7 Types of Threats We Avoid
Threats to:
physical health and safety or financial security
emotional safety, gender identity, and sexual well-being
sense of Self, self-efficacy, independence, and autonomy
love, acceptance, and connection
personal expression (thoughts, opinions, ideas, aesthetics, etc.)
knowing and wisdom
connection to something greater (nature, god, purpose, etc.)
Avoidance-Based Drivers Drain Energy
Instead of energizing us, using avoidance-based drivers tends to drain us – causing depletion when used persistently.
This is because underneath it all, we are being driven by fear. We fear the pain, discomfort, or unpleasantness that comes with common human scenarios like rejection, criticism, powerlessness, or scarcity.
Any amount of fear activates your sympathetic nervous system and so some energy is spent on the fight, flight, freeze, or fawn response. In mortal danger, it is energy well spent.
In regular life, it is wasted and long-term detrimental for the mind, body, emotions, or spirit. The nervous system kicks into high gear the moment any threat is detected, irrespective of the seriousness of the threat or potential level of harm.
Avoidance-based drivers are widely used because they are incredibly effective. Our self-preservation instinct is fiercely strong – whether of our fragile ego or actual mortality. It is such a mighty force that it can compel you to persist well past a reasonable stopping point.
Self-Check
I’d argue it’s worth your time to set aside 15-20 minutes to reflect on your use of avoidance-based drivers. Start by asking yourself what you really don’t like to experience at work when it comes to your performance or the quality of your work. You might also go through the categories of threats one by one and contemplate under which circumstances you experience the threats or what lengths you go to in order to avoid a threat.
Behind the Scenes of MOTIVATED AF
A glimpse into what it takes to write, publish, launch, and perpetuate this book.
In a conversation the other day, someone asked me how I went about structuring my book. Here is a glimpse into my process.
Look at Other Books
First, I did some intelligence gathering from other books.
Browse through 10-15 recent or bestselling books within the genre I intended to publish.
Take a picture/screenshot of each table of contents.
Skim the first three (or four) chapters of each and make a few notes on tone, approach, and how they set the reader up for the rest of the book.
Most books are structured into sections. Here is what I noticed.
Section I: Introduction
Many contemporary books in my genre start in the same general way. Chapter 1 hooks the reader and provides an overview of the whole book. Chapter 2 is all about why the author is qualified to write this book, why they are writing this specific book, and why now. Chapter 3 either dispels myths, defines concepts in the way the author intends to use them, or in some way level-sets the reader. Sometimes the level-setting takes two chapters and spills into Chapter 4. Sometimes Chapter 4 is the overview of the process detailed in Section II
Section II: The Heart of the Content
Books in my genre tend to guide the reader through a process, framework, system, mental model, or some sort of tool, and that is what follows the introductory chapters. One chapter to give an overview of the “tool”, then one chapter for each step of the process (if it must be done sequentially) or a chapter for each pillar/concept (in the order the author decides). And a final chapter in this section that integrates the information or helps the reader pull it all together.
Section III: Wildcard
I notice the most variation in section 3 of this genre of book. Sometimes it is applications or case studies. Sometimes it commissions the reader and offers a call to action. Sometimes it offers extensions for secondary audiences.
Lots of the books I looked at had three sections, but some had more, especially if there were lots of pillars/steps in the framework and it made more sense to break it into multiple sections.
MOTIVATED AF Structure
Here is the chapter structure of my book. I’ll probably try to come up with clever chapter subheading for everything in Section II. Maybe the sections themselves will end up with catchier titles.
Section I. Introduction
Chapter 1. The Roadmap: From Depletion and Dissatisfaction to Energized Fulfillment
Chapter 2. Triumphs and Trials: My Journey with Achievement and Fulfillment
Chapter 3. Myths, Misconceptions, and Unhelpful Beliefs
Chapter 4. Inner Drive 101
Section II. Elements of An Inner Drive
Chapter 5. Fulfilling Needs
Chapter 6. Seeking Satisfaction
Chapter 7. Avoiding Pain
Chapter 8. Pursuing Purpose
Chapter 9. Following Your Credo
Section III. Applications
Chapter 10. Aligning and Maintaining Your Inner Drive
Chapter 11. Moving Forward
Katherine ✨
